this year was one of the best of the best. and that was partly because i was somewhere else not in lancaster. and i feel over all at peace with everyone…..except one person at work.
we didnt have the fuss of trying to get all the children and their families together, melinda and i could just help jeannette and be apart of their family.
not that being in lancaster isn’t fun at christmas, it’s just well i didn’t realize this untill i got back, but everything in my house speaks of my mom, her ashes are even here, and i don’t know what to do with them. when we arrived back from boston i could feel the sad cloud descending the memories of running down to quarryville, to see mom. sympathy cards are still around some of her belongings are here.
its good to feel at peace with people especially the close relationships your suppose to be at peace with.spouse, children, close friends.. but at work there is always some person that works on the premise of walking on people and not being a team player.
part of the joy of this year there wasnt a lot of presents exchanged around me. not at work not at a family gathering i missed.
which is always a hard spot in my heart because i want to give every one tons of stuff. melinda and i havent even had the money at the right time to exchange gifts between us. don’t worry we will. its seems money is tight and gift giving can be a glittery distraction. there has been i time i would think it ok to credit card it up to give a splash to the kids or others in gifts.
the enjoyment of watching grand children anticipate the holiday is very heart healing. ellis spent christmas eve tracking santa’s progress. he and marlows joy of finding the cool things for them under their tree. the exclamation of cookies left out forsanta being gone. walking in woods christmas day with snow around, eating good food my daughter prepared. listening to jeannette, sam, melinda, and ellis play music together. fire in the fire place. it all made for a great christmas.