Overwhelmed by affection when I feel so low lost destroyed and unreachable.
It starts with really not caring if church happens for me or not. It dissolved in the first song. My inner distrust of myself. Singing with others taken up in song lyric, in the instruments plucking strumming and tapping…….vibrates through my body cleansing it by its rhythmic powers.
I don’t understand , but I believe, how I can be loved by a God who knows my every thought is evil,and selfish.
First John spells it out now in a sermon. Fellowship always needs to include sameness, love in a shared purpose. As we sang the first song it get revealed when I see the hands go up. The swaying to the tune the visable singing out with closed eyes.
Intimate, joy and peace. Our world is not redeemed around us. disappointed we still will get, …..love the people around you to get community, don’t control the process of community.
Intimacy, joy, purpose.
First John. We are called to joy.